Accidental Intoxication
by badly-knitted
Summary: There are reasons why people shouldn't mix alcohol with certain painkillers… Written for Theme Prompt #017: Altered State at fandomweekly. Set after Vol. 7.


**Title:** Accidental Intoxication

**Author:** badly-knitted

**Characters:** Bikky, Ryo, Dee.

**Rating:** PG-13

**Setting:** After Vol. 7.

**Summary:** There are reasons why people shouldn't mix alcohol with certain painkillers…

**Word Count:** 832

**Written For:** Amnesty 2 at fandomweekly, using Theme Prompt #017: Altered State.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FAKE, or the characters. They belong to the wonderful Sanami Matoh.

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Bikky stared at Ryo, appalled; he couldn't remember ever seeing his guardian in this state before. "You're drunk!"

Ryo peered myopically back at his foster son and wagged a finger at him, shaking his head and swaying. "Not drunk," he slurred. "Jus' a li'l tispy."

"Tipsy, babe," Dee corrected helpfully.

Ryo turned his head to regard his lover. "S'what I said. Tispy." He nodded vigorously, wavering unsteadily on his feet, and probably would have fallen over if Dee hadn't been holding him up.

Turning his outrage on the other man, Bikky's shocked expression morphed into anger. "What the hell did you do to him this time, you perv?"

Dee scowled back, indignant; why did the kid always blame him for everything? "Hey, don't go puttin' the blame on me; this isn't my fault! We joined the guys after work to celebrate Ted's birthday, and Ryo was stickin' strictly to non-alcoholic beverages because of the pain meds he's on, but somehow he must've picked up the wrong glass by mistake and drunk JJ's vodka and orange instead of his own orange juice. Either that or someone gave him the wrong drink. He couldn't have had much, but mixed with the painkillers… Ack! Stop that!"

Ryo's hand had started to wander, groping Dee's ass, which under most circumstances would have been a very welcome turn of events, but not in front of Bikky, who already looked like he wanted to kill Dee, and most certainly not when Ryo was too drunk to really know what he was doing.

Trying and failing to avoid the wandering hand, Dee turned his attention to his lover. "C'mon, babe," he said firmly. "Think I'd better get you into bed."

"Bed! Yes! SEX!" Somehow Ryo managed to squirm free of Dee's supporting arm as he tried to pull his partner towards the bedroom, completely forgetting that he had one foot in plaster. Only Dee dropping the crutches he was carrying in his other hand and making a lightning fast grab kept Ryo from falling flat on his face.

"Oops," Ryo giggled, blissfully unconcerned about the near disaster as he took the opportunity to grope Dee in an even more intimate place.

Bikky made a disgusted sound and turned away. "If he's hung over in the morning, you're taking care him; he's not my problem. I'm going to bed."

"Like I wouldn't do that anyway! I've been the one lookin' after him ever since he broke his foot, you little twerp, and have I ever complained?" Dee called after Bikky's retreating back as the boy stalked into his bedroom and slammed the door behind him so hard Dee half expected it to come right off its hinges.

Fending off Ryo's repeated attempts to undress him, Dee slung his inebriated lover over his shoulder and carried him into the master bedroom, dumping him unceremoniously on the bed before setting about undressing him. By the time Ryo was tucked beneath the covers he was fast asleep and snoring softly, leaving Dee horny and frustrated.

"The things I do for you," he sighed, stripping out of his own clothes and climbing into bed beside his lover, resigned to taking care of himself on account of Ryo having gotten him all worked up and raring to go before conking out. Not that they could have gotten up to all their usual bedtime acrobatics what with Ryo's broken foot, but still, this wasn't the end to their evening out Dee had been hoping for.

The next morning, Dee woke up with a pounding headache from the booze and a sore back from having to haul his drunken partner up three flights of stairs. He crawled wearily from the bed and headed for the bathroom in the hopes that a shower and a couple of painkillers from the medicine cabinet might help to revive him. Ryo on the other hand was as fresh as a daisy, not a trace of a hangover as he hobbled happily around the kitchen on his crutches, fixing breakfast. He also seemed to have no memory of the night before.

"Morning, Bikky," he said brightly as the boy blundered into the kitchen, yawning and rubbing his eyes. "Sleep well?"

"Uh, okay I guess. You?"

"Like a log; must be the painkillers. I don't even remember getting home last night after Ted's party. I hope we weren't too late."

"Nah, I think I heard you and the perv getting in around eleven," Bikky lied smoothly, sliding into his seat at the table as Ryo set a plate of scrambled eggs and toast in front of him.

It wasn't a difficult decision for the boy to make. If Ryo didn't remember the previous night, Bikky wasn't about to tell him; it would only serve to embarrass his dad. Besides, this way, he'd have leverage over Dee if he ever needed it. Bikky was pretty sure the perv would agree to just about anything to keep Ryo from finding out what had really happened.

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The End


End file.
